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Sunday, July 4, 2010

Jess & Scott & Me & Love

Here is an update on how Jess and I are doing. Jess and I exchange emails at least twice a day, sometimes more. Jess and I have decided to stop talking about our issues between us and our issues that each of us have with the other. He told me that discussing all that just frustrates us and causes more grief between us. He recommends that we put all that behind us and just be ourselves and work on getting to know each other all over again. I am all for that. I love him and want him in my life and am excited about growing again with him.

By the way, Drew wrote me a comment the other day (his second). Thanks Drew for explaining yourself and why you wrote that first "harsh" comment to me. It takes a big man to have the honesty that you have as well as the ability to kind of apologize if you feel that you may have offended someone.  Enough said, thanks Drew! Still sorry that I turned you off and that you needed to leave my blog.

Oh, I have to tell you all this! Tonight I am going to see this guy named Scott who I met exactly one year ago. He was awesome and we had a great night together back on July 4th 2009.  He is a big muscle dude (6' 1' 210lb, dark blond) and hot as hell and sex was great (no we didn't go all the way!). He lives about 45 minutes from me and even though we had a great night that first and only time we met, the combination of being far and me meeting Jess a few weeks later, put Scott and me on long term hold. He tried calling me to get together a number of times but again, I was with Jess and was happy and falling head over heals in love with Jess. Call me old fashioned, but once I met Jess I didn't need to be with anyone else, and I would never even put the idea in Jess's head that I might be wandering by keeping in touch with Scott. I somewhat forgot all about Scott.  Three days ago, Scott called me on the telephone. Long story short, I am seeing him tonight, exactly one year after we met. It is going to be fun. How am I going to feel about being with him after being only with Jess for so long.
  • Am I going to be sad about Jess? 
  • Will I feel guilty? 
  • Will I feel like I shouldn't be with Scott, even for one night? 
  • Will I get it up (I'm sure I will :-)  
  • Will I just have fun and surprise myself by not feeling sad or guilty and not even think of Jess? 
We will see! Things are going to be alright with Jess, I need to give him time and just be his friend for a while! I think I should be able to meet and be with others during this time, no? I will let you know how my night with Scott goes!

Happy July 4th to everyone! Be safe!   As always I am ending this blog entry with "I LOVE JESS".  I really think that Jess loves me too! Actually, I know he does!

1 comment:

drew said...

Problem is I cannot leave your blog. Just a rant.. I want to keep reading with hope that you will find YOUR happiness... Have a great time with Scott!!!