Did I mention in my last post that I have stopped speaking to Mary. The evening of Jess's birthday party, last Tuesday, was just too rough for me. Remember, I told you Mary texted me from the party telling me that the food and champagne that I ordered had not been served! She literally freaked me out and I had to call the restaurant and ask "What is going on?" Once they assured me that everything was fine, food and drink were served and that Jess was told of my anonymous birthday gift, I began to settle down and realize that knowing Mary was just too hard some times. She came home that night, almost in tears because Jess didn't speak much to her and she felt like everyone ignored her. She called herself the "short, fat, girl that no one likes." I love Mary but when I'm with her, it seems like we both commiserate about Jess and my issues with him translate into her being the friend that cares strictly because she needs to talk about him for her own reasons. She loves him and although she won't admit it, it makes me crazy and more sad to hear that she competes with me for Jess. I hate that and since Tuesday, I no longer can deal with it. I know I am not being that clear about this right now - I just actually woke up (Sunday morning) after a late night out. I will be back later to tell you all about that! No, I didn't get laid, coulda... but didn't want to but, nonetheless, I had a really nice night - I did something I never have done, believe it or not. I spent the night in gay bars. The first being a classy sports bar which I have been to a bunch of times before and the second, probably the biggest, sleaziest, dirtiest, tackiest dump in NYC! I had a great time and even made some new friends, I think. I really needed to do that!. I'll fill you in more about Mary and how I need to stay away for now and of course, I'll tell you more about Jess. Time for coffee!
2 comments:
I think this is a great decision. She has her own issues and you need to say clear of her. Keep your chin up. I think you will come out of this a stronger person, believe it or not!
Rain is great. It cleanses, washes away, renews and revives. I'm very fond of going out in really heavy rain to get soaked to the skin and let things that bother me and haunt me get washed away. Then coming back inside to a big fluffy towel and some dry clothes. Life is good.
I think backing away from your somewhat unwitting emotional vampire is a good thing. Do it with love, and an open heart, but you need to be your own person.
And as for your sojourns around the uh... less classy clubs, good for you! Sometimes we need junk food, it salves the soul and makes things seem brighter. I hope you have a good week, my dear.
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