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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Some Random Thoughts

Hope everyone's Labor Day weekend was fun. Mine was okay. Had some fun! This post might sound a bit random but my mood is random right now. I don't feel like writing a clearly thought out post; instead I feel like just speaking off the top of my head as thoughts pop into my mind.

I saw today that an old girlfriend of mine who is on my Facebook page is married. No big deal because when I accepted her friend request a few months ago, I saw that she included her married name in her Facebook account name. Today, I saw pictures of her family as I looked at my news feed. She's a lesbian! With a few adopted black kids. And a blond haired wife. Wow, good for her! I can't believe she is married to a woman, only because she and I dated and I had no clue back then. I'm sure that she also had no clue that I was gay. We used to fuck like rabbits. Funny, while I thought I was being sneaky and deceitful to not only myself but to her as I thought about men - she was most likely thinking about women. That's great! Life is amazing and funny that way. Anyway, congratulations to her and her beautiful wife and family.

I need to get an cat-scan next week. I've done them before but they are never pleasant. Especially since I have to drink this shit prior to having it done. Oh well, I have no choice so I'll just shut up and do it.

I have met so many new guys. This one guy who I met a few weeks ago from an online site is a nice guy. Lets call him Tom. He is nice. He's a lawyer and apparently has some bucks. No big deal if he does or he doesn't but he has this huge, beautiful loft in Soho. Such a cool place to hang out in. He was away last weekend for Labor Day and he texts me everyday. I don't hear bells and whistles when I think about him or when I was with him that first and only night. But is there anything wrong with keeping him as a friend? Is that leading him on?

Some nasty older black man came up to me at the sleaze bar last weekend. He had this serious, kind of creepy face. I wasn't sure if he was nuts or if he just had a poker-face. Anyway, he wanted my telephone number. I didn't give it to him but did he really think I would. He gave me his regardless of whether he thought I'd actually call. He kept telling me that he would, "Rock my world." Yeah, right okay. He kept grabbing his cock in his basketball shorts. It was the biggest, most unnatural thing I've ever seen. Amazing how I can sit here now and tell you that his big cock (which I saw while it was in his shorts because he kept stretching the fabric around it - you know how sleazy guys do that right?) was nasty as hell. I usually like guys with size but this was absolutely horrible.

Got together with my friend Ekrem this weekend too. He's been busy looking for a new apartment and we haven't had the chance to spend much time lately. It was good to see him. I like him; he's a good guy and a friend... but I hear no bells with him.

I continue to meet others and see if those bells will ever go off again.

This next comment is really important to me. The anniversary of 911, the 10th anniversary is only a few days away. My god it still makes me emotional to remember that beautiful, cloudless blue sky day. All those people who were killed; all those people who woke that day as if it were just another day and "just another day" it was not. Those poor people who stood at the windows and jumped; those poor souls who tumbled to their death under tons of steel and concrete; those tortured families who lost loved ones because of the most heinous act of hate and disrespect for life and humanity. God help us if that should ever happen again be it here in NYC or anywhere else in this world for that matter. Have we learned anything?? I don't think so - I really don't think so!

I will write more soon. I love having this blog and need to make it priority one. As I always say, I promise to write more!

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